Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
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I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
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The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
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