Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize