Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize