you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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