It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
