garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
You work out of a Hotel?
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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