I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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