i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize