in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize