I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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