i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize