I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
if only i could text you this smell
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize
