Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
