Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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