I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
