Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
