butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize
