Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Randomize
