your room smells of hookers.
And success
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
no you cant smoke seaweed
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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