we're blogging at a bar
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
