im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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