he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
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