the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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