The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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