Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
