"it" just moved
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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