Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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