Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
We need to get me chipped asap
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
