So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
