I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
