You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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