My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
