I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
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We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
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Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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