Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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