why didn't you poke me back
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize
