dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
