rhymes with "ouble enetration"
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies