Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
