Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
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