I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
