Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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