Me too!
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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