google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
