yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
