look no pants
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Randomize