there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize