So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Sext me about skeletons
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Randomize
