Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize
