Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Randomize
