so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Girls should come with a carfax report
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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