I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize