so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.